.... where family is the source of humor!

Who Taught Whom a Lesson? by Carol Wells

Everyone has a limit on how long to willingly put up with another individual's perceived bad or irritating habits. Especially when feeling you had dropped more than enough hints about finding that habit irritating. One morning Carol's father decided to not drop hints while, probably, optimistically thinking, "This will teach them a lesson or two."

My father kept the cars in the garage at night. This way, on cool or hot days, the car's interior was always comfortable. This also saved time since one did not have to shovel out the car or scrap the windows during the winter months.

Every evening Dad would park the cars in the garage. At bedtime, the dog and cat also relegated to sleeping in the garage. Tom, my cat, apparently thought my Dad's car was a piece of playground equipment that also conveniently doubled as an expensive, but unique, cat bed.

Every morning Dad would go out to the garage and see the cat's paw prints all over the front and back windows. Tom would sleepily open an eye from his resting spot on the car's roof then give a slight yawn as if saying, "Is it that time already? Come back later - I need another 10 or so winks."

Dad typically grumbled something about stupidity and cats while swatting Tom off the roof of the car. After several months of this routine Dad went out to the garage one morning and once again found Tom sleeping on top of the car. "Two damn cars to pick from, and he sleeps on the one I drive every day," Dad muttered.

From inside of the house my mother heard Dad leave for work. A few minutes later, she heard the garage door opening, sounds of a car going in then backing out before the garage door closed once again. She looked out the living room window in time to see Dad leave once more or work.

Mom thought this was curious since he did not go into the house but just pulled in and out of the garage. She waited a few minutes, since his office was only around 2 miles from the house, before calling to ask if he had forgotten something.

"No," he replied, " I didn't forget anything."

"Then why did you come back home," she asked.

"Carol's cat," he replied.

"The cat?"

"Yes," he replied with slight irritation showing in his voice. " I went out this morning and there was that cat, once again, sleeping on the roof of the car. I wasn't in the mood to swat it off so I got in the car and backed out, thinking this would scare the damn thing and it would jump off the car then, hopefully, have it quit using my car as a cat bed."

"Well, the cat's in the garage, so your stunt must've worked," my mother commented.

"Yeah, I know the cat is in the garage. I drove all the way to the office: 30 miles per hour, 2 stop signs, and a stop light, Only to get out of the car and find that animal still on the roof of the car and just looking at me - not phased one damn bit and hadn't moved an inch.

"So what did you do?" In most instances, this would be a redundant question but Mom was not thinking quickly while talking to Dad over the phone.

"What else could I do," he replied. "I got back in the car, drove back home, pulled into the garage, swatted the cat off the car, and then left for work again. That is why the cat is in the garage now. God only knows how many people saw me driving around town with the damn thing perched on the car's roof."

Every morning after that Dad just swatted the cat off the car's roof, while typically muttering under breath about stupidity and cats but had learned his lesson while wishing the cat would eventually quit sleeping, or playing, on Dad's car. (Tom never did - I think the cat either enjoyed this morning ritual with my father or hoped for another spin around town.)

Humorous Book Recommendations:             [ view all ]
Non Campus Mentis: World History According to College Students
[Anders Henriksson, compiler; 145 pages]
A collection of hilarious North American college student essays compiled by Anders. Laugh until you cry over as the students share bizarre and very unknown twists and turns in history! Oh my my my ... teachers and parents, without cringing now, can you relate?

Never try to outstubborn a cat.
-- Robert A. Heinlen The Notebooks of Lazarus Long

Humor Is Relative thanks Cay Dickson, from the Houston Chronicle, for the compliment!

The moment may be temporary, but the memory is forever.
-- Bud Meyer

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You can keep a dog but it is the cat who keeps people because cats find humans useful domestic animals. A dog will flatter you but you have to flatter the cat. A dog is an employee; the cat is a freelance.
-- George Mikes How to be Decadent

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The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails.
-- William Arthur Ward